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By Jon, January 15, 2009 7:36 am

I got home from work yesterday and was struck with great sadness when I heard the news … Ricardo Montalban had passed away at the age of 88. An actor whose career spanned decades, for geeks like me he will be forever remembered as the antithesis to then Admiral James T. Kirk, Khan Noonien-Singh.

Of all Trek movies, TWOK remains my all time favorite and Montalban’s performance is a significant reason for my undying love and affection for the film.

Talk about a dagger. May he enjoy his eternal stay on Seti Alpha V.

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By Jon, April 10, 2007 10:07 am

My good buddy Dan over at BigPlansBigCrash did me the great honor of tagging me in his post, “What Makes BpBc Tick?”. So now it’s my turn to list the 5 Reasons Why I Blog … here I go:

I Embrace My Inner Geek: The name of this here blog comes from a line from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. Enough said … I write about what I enjoy, things like: Spider-Man, Battlestar Galactica, Transformers, and Star Trek. There will always be a segment of the population that gravitates towards these subjects, and there are others that will avoid them. I am absolutely cool with that.

I Enjoy Writing: The only thing that is more cathartic for me than writing is going out for a run. It gives me a different kind of high, and one of the best feelings is being on a creative roll and banging out 4 or 5 posts.

I Have Been Doing This For A While: I started my Interweb ventures during my junior year in high school, and there is no foreseeable end in sight. It’s almost to the point of addiction, it’s kinda like freebase cocaine.

I Do It Because I Don’t Care: I could care less about what individuals may have to say about me. I launch right back at people, I don’t pull punches, and nothing is sacred.

I’m Kind of a Big Deal Around Here: Or so I would like to think.

Now for the 5 individuals that I have come to know directly through DDoY, and who have helped me along the way with words of inspiration and advice: Uncle Buck, Stephen, Matt, Dan (of course), and the Thighmaster who proclaimed DDoY as ‘the bestest internerd use of a Star Trek 4 ref’.

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By Jon, April 3, 2007 11:04 pm

I hate people who hot link. It chews up my bandwidth that I have to pay for. I don’t mind if people want to link to my blog, but damnit give some credit. Earlier this evening I was going over my web stats and noticed a spike coming from this Xanga site, and one profile in particular. Let me preface this by saying that I have never been on Xanga, being that I thought it was for Asians only.

The profile in question was for a kid named Damon, who’s Xanga handle is starsfallfromthesky. Kind of lame right? Well he hot linked a picture from one of my Movie PoopShoots regarding Spider-Man 3. The image in question, of Spider-Man and Venom came from JoBlo … AND I gave credit.

Did starsfallfromthesky do that? Or ask if he could hot link? No he did not. So, I changed some things around and look at what he’s got on his Xanga (click for larger):

So what if the kid was born in 1989 and looks like some Fall Out Boy reject …. all I ask for is a little courtesy.

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By Jon, April 2, 2007 3:19 pm

About 4 1/2 years ago I purchased a Klippan sofa from IKEA. For $200 you couldn’t go wrong. It’s comfortable, albeit Swedish and it serves its purpose. Last night I noticed an odd smell eminating from it. I couldn’t place it. I didn’t have any food or other persihable items in my room … no dirty laundry … than what possible could it be? With the help of my brother and fiance we were able to narrow it down to small area that smelled awlful. There weren’t any stains on it, and I’m not in the practice of sitting pantless on it after a lovely Mexican dinner. It smelled like ass. I threw away the pillows, pulled off the faux-sheep skin cover, and Febreezed the shiz out of it. Hopefully when I return home tonight, all will be well in my universe. Now the mystery remains, Who Sharted On My Couch?

And for the uninitiated, the term “sharted” comes from the film Along Came Polly where Phillips Seymour Hoffman’s character (Sandy Lyle) has this exchange with Ben Stiller’s character (Reuben Feffer)

Sandy Lyle: Reuben, I’m in a situation here. We have to leave now.
Reuben Feffer: No. Can we stay a couple more minutes?
Sandy Lyle: Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted.
Reuben Feffer: I don’t know what that means.
Sandy Lyle: I tried to fart and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let’s go.
Reuben Feffer: You’re the most disgusting person I’ve ever met in my life.

I will be sure to keep you all apprised of the Mystery Sharter.

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By Jon, February 9, 2007 12:02 am

Sawyer is my new favorite character on Lost, after delivering what is arguably the best line in show history on Wednesday night. The line, “Don’t be mad just because you got fooled by the old Wookie prisoner trick” was delivered after having ambushed an “Other” Security Guard (who happened to be that guy from It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia).

I couldn’t get over how purely geek that line was. I can only imagine what the writing room looked like after that line was written. Mayhem most certainly ensued.

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By Jon, February 4, 2007 4:38 pm

Yesterday, Ashley and I took in the sights of the Philadelphia International Auto Show at the Pennsylvania Convention Center. I believe that it was either the third or fourth time we’ve gone. Each and every time you go, it is pretty much the same thing: expensive cars on turntables and out of control children jumping around in $30,000 jungle gyms. I don’t understand how parents will just let their kids run wild on an Acura MDX’s clutch. In the meantime all you want to do is check out the interior and you have some sloppy 5 year old scuffing up leather interior and ripping the knobs off of the in-dash DVD player.

Regardless, we had an enjoyable time and got to check out what we hope will be our next rides. As it turned out, we skipped most of the domestic automakers, being that Ash drives a Subaru and I am a Scion owner … and that they aren’t all that interesting. Call me crazy, but the redesigned Ford Focus just doesn’t warm my cockles. I found the ‘Tuner Salon’ which featured some Scions and their after-market modifications to be actually pretty cool.

My favorite part of the show (other than my Cecily Tynan autograph SCORE!), walking around and identifying which cars were going to be in the upcoming Transformers movie. I saw Bumblebee (2009 Chevy Camaro), Jazz (Pontiac Solstice), Iron Hide (GMC Topkick), Barricade (Ford Mustang Saleen), and Ratchet (Hummer H2).

In light of that, I found some snazzy images of the Ironhide toy from the upcoming Transformers movie (Courtesy of TFW2005). This is the first time I have seen the robot-mode of Ironhide, and I’m totally jacked. My only hope is that Peter Cullen voices him as well, much like he did in the G1 Series. Anyways, enjoy.

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By Jon, February 2, 2007 10:22 am

Surprisingly enough, I never weighed in on Marvel’s current mini-series/event, Civil War. It has been a financial success for the House of Ideas from the start. Frenzied customers descended upon their local shops to nab up every issue starting back in May 2006 when Civil War #1 hit stands. My feelings are mixed on CW thus far, it’s a good read but its culmination is too long in the making.

Civil War has had some “Oh Shit” moments that really turn the Marvel Universe on its ear. They unmasked Spiderman, killed off Goliath (who?), cloned Thor, broke up the Fantastic Four … oh and made you realize how much of a piece of shit that Iron Man/Tony Stark really is. IMO, Marvel has done a good job of recovering from that awful schlock fest that was House of M in 2005. CW#6 left me with a … you’re serious … Hulkling was the key to Civil War. Horseshit.

Well, CW#7 comes out this month (finally), and Newsarama treated us to a preview of Michael Turner’s Variant Cover for Civil War #7. The impending final battle should be reminiscent of Millar’s work with the Ultimates and a visual treat. Anyway, here you go.

I don’t know about you guys, I’m rooting for Cap.

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By Jon, January 9, 2007 9:43 am

A former WWF tag team, “The Killer Bees” were found inside a home in St. Bernard Parish. A contractor doing work on the property said that these bees were overly aggressive and kept on taunting him by saying that, “Anvil was a homo” and “…the Iron Sheik can kiss my American ass”. Beside himself, the contractor called in the local authorities who advised him not to make any sudden moves, or mention Wrestlemania III. After several hours, The Killer Bees were forced out of the property by the Honky Tonk Man and Ricky Steamboat. They fled towards the north, and anyone with small children or pets should has been advised to keep them indoors. The subjects are said to have flowing mullets, oily muscles, and yellow & black striped underwear. They have a tendency for high flying acrobatics and severe grappling. Be Advised.

The Killer Bee’s fall from grace started began soon after their loss to The Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff at Wrestlemania III. Dejected and destitute, the tag team found themselves slipping in popularity and their dream of a WWF Tag Team championship slipped away.

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By Jon, January 3, 2007 12:22 am

Have you seen the trailers for the new Cedric The Entertainer vehicle, “Code Name: The Cleaner”. If you haven’t, here’s some Youtubeness.

After watching this trailer on TV approximately 13 times I asked myself … why did Hollywood make this cantankerous piece of garbage? Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate Lucy Liu as much as the next guy, but is this really necessary? According to movies.com, the story goes something like this:

Cedric the Entertainer plays an amnesiac janitor who carries information that is incriminating to the FBI in his subconscious. In order to stop him from talking, agents dupe him into thinking he is an undercover secret agent.

Here’s what I am trying to picture, an upcoming hot-shot writer walks into New Line Cinema says and pitches his big idea. I’m imagining that it went something like this:

Pitch Guy: It’s a story about a man who happens to be a janitor at the FBI Headquarters, but he gets amnesia but then some hot broads dupe him into thinking he’s a super spy.
New Line CEO: I like it, who are you hoping to cast in the lead?
Pitch Guy: Maybe that guy Dwight from The Office.
New Line CEO: That’s a possiblilty. I don’t like it though.
Pitch Guy: Why not? Rainn Wilson is a comedic savant.
New Line CEO: Let’s get us a black guy, because we all know they are funnier than us white folk. And besides I have a tremendous amount of white guilt as I wipe my ass with $100 bills. What about Nick Cannon? He’s hilarious
Pitch Guy: Um, isn’t he’s busy with that ghetto version of Whose Line Is It Anyway?
New Line CEO: You’re right! Call Cedric The Entertainer!

And New Line Cinema gave this movie a $27 million budget, that’s more than the GNP of many Third World countries. Hollywood just pushed movies out anymore. They don’t care about quality or artistic integrity. Instead they rely on focus groups and in doing so market these movies to the smallest possible audience.

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By Jon, July 26, 2006 12:05 am

I was listening to Fox News on XM and they covered a story coming out of Nephi, Utah. Unfortunately, this time it has nothing to do with the cult that is Mormonism. Oh and how I do love me some Mormons. In a particular neighborhood, a family has a 13 year old “developmentally delayed” son who has the aquity of a 3 year old. The neighbors of said family are tired of this little fella running amok up and down the street. He was throwing rocks at the other kids, wandering into houses, and so forth. The neighbors have called the cops, nothing has been done. Their solution was to erect a sign:

Now that takes neighbor feuds to a whole new level and I APPLAUD THEM. In my years of neighborly battles I have never escalated to DEFCON 2 like these guys have. I don’t think that sign hangers are to be criticized and condemned. This family has to be able to reel their kid in, put a helmet on him, and feed him some mashed potatoes or something. The last thing I would want to hear at night is the wailings of a “developmentally delayed” youth. So now ever advocacy group in the state of Utah is jumping on these guys asses. Advocates for the “persecuted” family are equating the use of retard as a racial slur. I’m sorry but that’s apples and oranges you tree huggers. I don’t think this sign has the same impact as say …. a burning cross? I mean the Nazis put up signs saying “Achtung Juden”. So now, this family that has been dealing with Corky all this time are on the same level as the KKK or Hitler? I THINK NOT. What ever happened to personal responsibility in this country? How is this our problem?

I get sick and tired of this politically correct bullshit. It’s just a matter of time before the Zombie Hordes are unleashed from the depths of hell.