Jill Biden Is My New Favorite Person

Not only is she kinda hot, but Jill Biden let a doozy slip when she and her husband, Vice President-elect Joe Biden made an appearance on Oprah yesterday.

Apparently Biden had his pick between VP and Secretary of State, and Hillary got stuck with whatever was left over. HAHA. That’s what we like to refer to as a DAGGER! in these here parts.

Is it just me or does Joe Biden look like the kind of guy who’d just punch you in the face if the disagreement got a little too heated?

CNN is Milking This For All It’s Worth

Yesterday morning I woke up and started making breakfast. Per my normal Saturday ritual, I turned on the TV to catch the news. Instead … I caught the Obama Express.

Yes, from 10a-7p yesterday, CNN had cameras trained on the Obama Express as our President-elect made his way from Philadelphia to Washington, D.C. I couldn’t believe my eyes … so I checked the channel listing, and sure enough on Ch. 221 CNNHD … Obama Express.

80% of CNN’s coverage was of Anderson Cooper reading fun facts about the train, and grainy webcam images from reporters on board said Express.

And if you thought Delaware was terrible just driving through, try watching Wolf Blitzer talk about it and watching a train go through it at real time.

Black Panthers Make Voting Easy In North Philadelphia

Apparently the Black Panthers went out of there way this morning to provide “security” for one polling location in West Philadelphia. One intrepid UPenn student got this story started with a camera phone. I had no idea that the Black Panthers will still active … and more importantly that those sweet berets and night sticks are standard issue at 9:00 in the morning.

Oh and Fox News totally ran with this news story. Poor Rick Levanthal almost got his ass kicked …

Isn’t democracy grand?

Seriously, These People Are Voting Tomorrow

If these videos do not make you want to perform Seppuku before you head to the polls tomorrow, I don’t know what will. Nothing is more frustrating about the democratic process is that absolute fucking idiots are afforded the opportunity to participate in deciding who are next leaders will be.

I had no idea that Obama was going to pay for mortgages and gas. Where was that in his economic plan? I must have missed that the first time around. And no I’m just not picking on Obama supporters. McCain people can be just as bad … like this crazy old lady.

This kind of stuff makes me yearn for a legitimate third party option. None of this Ralph Nader or Cynthia McKinney bull shit, but an honest to god “party” that exists outside the traditional political machinations of Washington DC. Shit, I even voted for Ron Paul in the Pennsylvania primary … because honestly I’m not impressed either way. As of 10:00pm on Election Day Eve … I’m still undecided

And Now For Something Completely Different

Politics have always been of particular interest to me. The mechanisms and motivations behind the American political system are beyond rational comprehension, which is abundantly evident considering this current election cycle. Since I became politically ‘aware’ I have always identified myself as a conservative. I believe in fiscal responsibility, national defense, and low taxes. I have no desire or want for the American government to get involved in legislating my activities on a personal level. I also maintain a general disdain for democrats and their liberal ilk.

In college I became very active. I found myself a member in good standing of the College Republicans, attending rallies and protests, even volunteering for the Bush/Cheney 2004 re-election campaign. Shit, I was even a “blogger for Bush”. Four years later and I don’t know if it was the stagnation in Iraq, or Bush’s inability to secure our borders … but I’ve become wholly indifferent to the political process.

With the election just over thirty days away, I really don’t care who lands in office. On one hand I firmly believe that the Republicans deserve a time out. They’ve fucked up pretty bad. On the other, there is just something about checking off anything in the “D” column that gives me douche chills up my spine. In my heart of hearts I really want to vote for McCain. If anyone could ever say to America, “Hey you owe me one” it’s this guy. I held out hope that his running mate would get me off the fence. Sadly, Sarah Palin does nothing for me … politically. Sure she’s good to look at, and boy I do enjoy her daughter of questionable morals.

I have no I dead what am I going to do come November 4th. Will I follow my conservative instincts and join the McCainiacs? Or will be a part of the Barack Attack on the White House?

Cobra Commander For President

I don’t know how I missed this big announcement from everyone’s favorite terrorist leader … (no not that one), Cobra Commander as he has announced his campaign for President of the United States.

I really haven’t been too excited by any candidate, but I think I could get behind Cobra Commander. Good ol chrome dome announced his candidacy on G4TV’s Attack of the Show.

Dennis Kucinich, Lover of Fine Wine & UFOs

We all knew that Rep. Dennis Kucinich was batshit crazy but this clip from the Democratic debate, courtesy of Philadelphia Will Do the country will finally realize that he is a raving lunatic.

Tim Russert was rather tool-like, but at least we now know that 14% of Americans have seen a UFO. If I were a Democrat (which I’m not) I would be inclined to vote for this crazy, Gollum looking man.

Also if you head over to his official website, you can enter a raffle (via donation) to go on a double date with Rep. Kucinich and his wife to the eating establishment of your choosing. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m going smash my Spider-Man piggy bank as soon as I get home so I can get a crack at this opportunity. Can you imagine the dinner conversation? It would probably involve him telling stories about his Troll collection, or the time he got a peak down Nancy Pelosi’s skirt. Anyway, it’s a matter of months before Kucinich’s campaign implodes, but at least til then he’ll keep us entertained.

Watch Michael Moore Own Wolf Blitzer

Let me preface the rest of this post by saying that I am by no means a Michael Moore fan. I find him to be an acerbic and inflammatory individual that just rubs Middle America the wrong way through his films. His latest target is the U.S. health care industry in his documentary Sicko. We’ve all seen the trailer numerous times at this point, and we got the gist. Eventually I’ll end up seeing this, probably through Netflix. Recently Michael Moore appeared on Wolf Blitzer’s Situation Room. Right before the interview, CNN ran a piece in an attempt to eviscerate Moore’s argument. Check out the clip in it’s entirety and witness the puddle of piss around Wolf’s feet after Moore totally pwns him.

Wait, There Are Klingons in the White House?

I love Star Trek, hence the title of this blog (see Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home). Apparently Congressman David Wu (D-Oregon) has enjoyed his fair share of Star Trek as well.

On January 10th, while taking the floor of the House of Representatives, compared members of the Bush Administration to various alien species of the Star Trek universe, namely Vulcans and Klingons. The following YouTube clip speaks for itself:

My favorite line of Congressman Wu’s is “Don’t let faux Klingons send real Americans to war”. This guy is an elected official, a representative of the people of Oregon, who holds spots on the Education & Science committees and appropriately enough he serves on the Subcommittee on Space and Aeronautics. Makes sense right? This guy gets to play an RPG with American taxpayer’s dollars. Awesome.

How are we supposed to take these guys seriously, first Rick Santorum comparing Iraq to Middle Earth … and now this. I’m all for using a movie line to get a laugh, but using colorful Star Trek metaphors is just too much.

God Bless Representative Democracy.