Bath Fitter, The Saddest Booth @ Wizard World Philadelphia Comic Con

If you figured that the booth featuring the Twilight moms at the Fangs, Fur & Fantasy selling their fan fiction was the most awkward and saddest booth on the show floor, good try but you are wrong.

Because when I think Wizard World Philadelphia Comic Con I immediately think, I wish there was someone there that could give me information on how to cheaply give my bath surround facelift.  

Bath Fitter, The Saddest Booth @ Wizard World Philadelphia

Bath Fitter, The Saddest Booth @ Wizard World Philadelphia

 

 

Invaders From Mars (1986) Warped My Childhood

What do you get when you give Tobe Hooper, director of Poltergeist and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the go ahead to remake the 1953 science fiction classic Invaders From Mars? Well you get a teacher, who has been taken over by malevolent aliens inhaling frog like its a corn dog in the back of a classroom.

So yes it’s completely understandable that this movie drastically altered my worldview at a very young age. A young kid witnesses an alien craft land in his town, and finds himself the only one aware of the Martian invasion. Only his school nurse can help him, because well everyone else are basically aliens wearing human skin suits.

I haven’t had an opportunity to revisit Invaders From Mars in at least 10-15 years, so I can’t really say how it holds up. For those who have never known of the film’s existence, I’ve included the theatrical trailer below.

Another Reason To Never, Ever End Up In Oakland

I picked up the following video from Deadspin, (who in turn picked it up from Barstool Sports), of a “freak hoe fight” in a Burger King parking lot in Oakland. While I consider myself an educated man and rather adept at this whole writing thing … I can’t describe it better than it already has been on YouTube:

A bunch of freak hoes fighting in a BK parking lot in Oakland. Girl hits pregnant girl, pregnant girl throws high chair, dude wrecks pregnant girl, pregnant girl talks shit to old lady, old lady chases pregnant girl with water bottle, some more fighting, then a motorcycle cop gets hit by a car. regular stuff.

I’d like to point out a couple things:

  • Where’d the random dude with a pitbull come from?
  • Why are the principal female combatants running around sans pants?
  • When the police responded one of their motorcycles got hit by a car.
  • Highchairs are not effective weapons, it’s common sense.
  • Minivan Guy and his Girlfriend beat the HELL out of the Pink Pantyhose girl … who was Pregnant.

It’s been rough going for Oakland, with the recent rioting and looting in response to the involuntary manslaughter verdict (which is the verdict they are referring to the video) in the trial of former BART Police Officer who was accused of murdering 22-year-old Oscar Grant on a BART station platform in January 2009.

So all in all this really isn’t helping Oakland’s image, which has the nation’s fourth highest violent crime rate and is facing the likelihood of laying off nearly 100 police officers this year … and even more next year. So what did I take away from this experience? To never find myself in a Burger King parking lot in Oakland … because this is just “regular stuff” there.

Sadly, Steve Rogers Never Got To Be A Broadway Star

It’s been a goal of mine to reassemble the entire 155-issue run of the Marvel GI Joe books. While perusing some of the issues I picked up at Wizard World a couple of months ago, I came upon one of the most truly awful contests that Marvel has every run in their history.

Cap Never Got To Be A Broadway Star

It’s 1986, and the House Of Ideas decided that the best way to reach out to other segments is to stage a Broadway show. I don’t think Cap ever found a “girl between 10 and 14 who can sing, dance and act up a storm”, and he never got to see his name in lights on the marquee.

Fun With Google Analytics

I’ve never been one to get too caught up in referrals or generating click-thrus. Granted I’ve made feeble attempts to monetize DDOY through Google AdSense, but I never had the will power to follow through with it. I do like to keep an eye on who is referring visitors my way, as I try to return the favor.

Fun With Google AnalyticsThe other day I noticed a bump when Rob the leader of ToplessRobot gave me credit on something I had posted on twitter earlier that morning. It gave me nearly a 30% bounce in traffic, which I am certainly appreciative of and it prompted me to check out some of the other meta, namely that of search engine keywords.

Phillies’ outfielder Jayson Werth’s cougarific mom accounts for four of my top 10 keyword searches. She’s followed up obviously, by queries for “Ali Larter Ass” and “Hayden Panetierre Ass”, “old broads”, and of course … zombies.

Considering I spend 80% of my blogging efforts on all things Transformers, Tricia Helfer, and comic book reviews I find these results to be rather intriguing. It also makes me wonder about the dregs of the Interweb that cruise on through here.

GI Joe Looks Utterly Craptastic

Over the last couple of days, Paramount has released new character posters for the upcoming GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra which is set for theaters on August 7, 2009. Um. No.

Let’s just say that the Internet hasn’t been too kind to Director Stephen Sommers’ adaptation of the toyline and cartoon. The only thing that has received praise was the casting of Ray Parks as Snake Eyes … and Sienna Miller’s ass.

The decision to put all of the Joes in the bland, molded body armor strips away everything that made them cool as toys, comics, and cartoons. Each character was unique, had a gimmick and reinforced that they were the best at what they did. Instead we get molded muscles on Snake Eyes, boob holsters for Scarlett … and a Wayans brother in an action movie.

More posters after the jump …

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Saved By Zero? Enough Already.

The commercial for Toyota’s “Saved By Zero” promotion infuriates me on a level which I have never experienced before. I thought it would have been over after seeing it all the way through the Phillies championship run; but no the madness continues.

Who ever greenlit this campaign needs to be hit in the face with a bag of hot nickels. And how the frak can you be saved by zero? Hey, I’m a fan of Toyota products … I drive a Scion but this just needs to stop.

Seriously, These People Are Voting Tomorrow

If these videos do not make you want to perform Seppuku before you head to the polls tomorrow, I don’t know what will. Nothing is more frustrating about the democratic process is that absolute fucking idiots are afforded the opportunity to participate in deciding who are next leaders will be.

I had no idea that Obama was going to pay for mortgages and gas. Where was that in his economic plan? I must have missed that the first time around. And no I’m just not picking on Obama supporters. McCain people can be just as bad … like this crazy old lady.

This kind of stuff makes me yearn for a legitimate third party option. None of this Ralph Nader or Cynthia McKinney bull shit, but an honest to god “party” that exists outside the traditional political machinations of Washington DC. Shit, I even voted for Ron Paul in the Pennsylvania primary … because honestly I’m not impressed either way. As of 10:00pm on Election Day Eve … I’m still undecided